Expectations and Hard Choices

After I came back from studying abroad, I hit the ground running. I have never really disclosed things I am involved with to my readers, but I am definitely not bored. I was president of two different honors groups, a determined sales associates at a boutique, in love with someone whose not in the country, and working hard to keep my GPA high for UC level.

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As of now, I have resigned from presidency from one of those honors groups, quit my job, and I have moved on from my long distance relationship. However, I have an internship providing web content, working for the school I attend, and sent in all my applications waiting to hear back from a 4-year University. Why am I filling you all in on this?

Was I expecting so much change within such a short period of time? Absolutely not. And the unfortunate thing is, the end of each one came to play with the other. It really makes me think maybe if I didn’t give up on one thing, maybe this domino effect wouldn’t have occurred. By all means, I am not sure how to feel about all this change. I am happy, but sometimes I miss it.

You gotta take in the good with the bad. Sometimes, you’re not going to always feel secure. You gotta make a choice, and each choice you make will probably not be easy. And when you make that choice, you need to be ready for change. Keep your expectations level-headed because you need to meet it in the middle, high expectations and low expectations are hard enough to grasp when you’re trying to stay grounded.

Make smart mistakes now, so you won’t live a stupid life.

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I wrote this draft 16 days ago, before I even put in my two weeks, ended things with my ex, and the school semester ended. Damn, I cannot believe how much can change in over 2 weeks. Yes, 4 days ago was my last day at work. Yes, I am no longer with my ex. I have a whole month until the new semester starts to myself. Which means my new job doesn’t start until school starts. What am I gonna do? Well, I’m gonna start creatively writing again. I’m going to finish the books I’ve meant to finish. I’m gonna start my kickboxing classes again. With all the choices and expectations you need to make in life, there’s one thing you should do and that’s  exercising your freedom for self-growth.

I guess the thing I want my readers to know from this piece is, don’t be afraid to make the right choice for yourself. It is hard to clearly see what is right for you when there’s other people or even groups involved, but you can only lie to yourself for so long. Will it be scary to know that maybe you’re only choice to be happy is to completely let go of a relationship, a job, or/and leadership position? Yes, it is entirely. However, if it is stealing your happiness, you won’t even realize how good it is to have that weight off of you until you say goodbye. Trust me, it feels good.

And who knows, maybe it’s not that at all. Maybe you actually loved what you were doing, but another opportunity came up and you would be an idiot to deny that open door. If you’re working part-time for example, this job probably isn’t your dream job. It’s just a stepping stone to the mainland. Saying goodbye to any chapter of your life is scary, but that’s what makes life so exciting too. Because you are officially turning to the next page and writing the new chapter. It’s fresh, it’s new, and that’s what we all should strive for.

Expect more blog posts this upcoming month my lovelies.

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From Cambridge to OC

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Nobody tells you how scary it is before you actually study abroad. It’s such an exciting adventure, woohoo. Once you make that deposit, that commitment, there’s no going back. Now, you have to pack and be smart about your surroundings. I have not left my house for so long. No, I do not live under a rock and obviously I go to school, work, and other extracurricular activities. However, I have never been on my own since 5th grade when we had a camping trip  with my whole class one weekend. Even that doesn’t count, let’s be honest.

I took this chance without even checking with any of my friends if they were willing to take the leap with me. None of them had the time or money to do it. Thus the cherry on top, I was going to study abroad at University of Cambridge with a group of people I’ve never met. Sure, we had a few meetings beforehand and a few classes too. Unfortunately, the tension and discomfort was still overwhelming for all. To my surprise, three out of the twenty-eight people who were going knew each other. We were all on the same boat.

July 2nd- departure day. My boyfriend and I get to LAX, and I leave with a worried, heavy heart. I get through security and we do not board the plane for another hour or two. At that moment, it was as if a light bulb turned on for everybody. We were all doing this together, it’s time to REALLY get to know each other.

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Cambridge is amazing. The scenery can make you stop what you’re doing and lure you to enjoy things you forget about everyday in California. There is more green than urban life. The livestock grazing in fields is astounding. Even the rain was so welcoming and delightful to be caught in. The best part? Getting to share those moments with my fellow classmates. We all knew we were experiencing something special together.

We stayed in flats at a complex called, Cromwell Court. The school we attended at Cambridge was named, Sidney Sussex College. Then our classroom was known as the Coach House. All three of these places, will always have a special place in my heart. I’d wake up in my own flat to go downstairs to wait for my friends in the central part of Cromwell Court. We would head to Sidney Sussex to either eat in the mess hall or use it as a short cut to grab some take-away from the local eateries. Later, we would  walk through Jesus Green (one of the biggest and most unbelievable parks I’ve ever seen) to make it to Coach House in time for class. It was a spectacular time.

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I was able to travel to London, Paris, and Amsterdam. When you take the first step to travel outside of your country, you kind of get the hang of doing it. You feel like a real adult and a lil’ adventurer. London wasn’t my favorite, but the history of it is incredible. Then, Paris definitely kept you on your toes since pick-pockets creep on the streets wherever you are, but it does not discredit the beautiful culture of this place. The food was fantastic (Croque Madame is a must), the Louvre contained breathtaking pieces I was so excited to appreciate (“The Raft of Medusa”, “The Olympia”, “Mona Lisa”, etc.), and the historical sights were so grand and beautiful in scale (Eiffel Tower & The Notre Dame). As for Amsterdam, it had to be my absolute favorite so that needs to be separate from this blog post for I have too much to say about it.  The transportation all around in Europe is so much more convenient and better for the environment. I envy that my country hasn’t transitioned to using bikes, trams, trains, and buses as often as they do. The produce and everything seems to have the sole purpose of benefiting the citizens.  Their lifestyle, I wish I can be part of it for the rest of my life. I really would love to move to Europe. Specifically, Amsterdam would be a great place to live.

By the end of this trip, the different countries were not the only things that enriched who I am. There were the people who were with me. There were those who challenged my patience, and I learned there were some battles worth fighting and some worth letting go. I learned people you think were certain ways were completely not what they appear, and people who seem to have dispositions have a past that influences their being. They made me laugh, they made me cry, they made me appreciate who I was. They inspired me to be more than the titles I have back at home. My creative side seemed to return with a will to not give up what I love to do most. I ended up writing a poem about every single one of them because they made that much of an impact on my life. Now that I am back, it is pretty obvious it won’t be the same. Luckily, my memories will never change because nothing in my life can make me see this experience as less than happy, ever.

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Where the hell have I been?

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I am not going to lie, I have been pretty absent from writing on this blog. I will call myself out on that. Sometimes, taking care of yourself in real life is more important. My blog became one my last priorities, something I hoped going into it would never happen. Furthermore, what were my priorities that came before my blog? I will tell you but it won’t be in order of importance. I needed to focus on finals, my boyfriend, and everything in between before I descended into studying abroad at University of Cambridge.

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Yep, you are getting a blog post coming from the UK. I am currently sitting in a room full of people who I barely knew 3 weeks ago. Now, they are the family I needed more than I knew during this whole experience. This group of people I am traveling will be the only people who are experiencing the same exact events and walks I am dealing with during this adventure. There are people who I love, there are people where we can’t seem to get pass our differences. Either way, I am having the best time. I had to prepare getting here and I have to absorb my time here while I still have it. THIS was one of the big reasons why I’ve been missing. Had to make sure all of my ducks were in a row before I left, and had to make sure I was enjoying my time here without isolating myself from great people who are here.

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To the people who ever are debating about whether they should take the jump to study abroad, DO IT!

P.S. I plan on doing separate blog posts focusing on certain topics (why you should study abroad/my experience, my boyfriend maybe ;), etc.) but for now I wanna claim my presence is back!

A Week Into Having A Blog…

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A lot of things happened in a span of a week. I tried to sell my old clothes with an idea of an Instagram pop-up shop. Unfortunately, that idea got shot down real fast by my parents because they are royal worriers. I am not too bummed because it is a bit complicated figuring out the transportation and delivery service for my inventory. I’m gonna just take quick stop at a thrift shop and/or donate my clothes somewhere where they’re needed more probably.

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Why did I decide to mention this story? Simple. It is easy to get caught up and consumed with something new. We all have experienced something that involves so much attention and excitement, you almost forget everything around you and who you are. We come from a generation where we enjoy instant gratification. Instagram likes, re- Tweets, and even views on Snapchat stories are tiny boosts of esteem. I even wrote in my journal to remind myself that my blog is meant for my own enjoyment along with helping others with advice and fashion inspiration. To entertain and enlighten is my cause. In other words, I guess I got too excited about my blog with social marketing. Furthermore, once I hear one person say I should sell my old clothes, I was hooked and suckered. Donating my clothes like I usually do, barely crossed my mind!

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I am a busy gal. Most of us are busy. And if one of my readers finds their life not too busy, try to get out of your comfort zone and search for what makes you want to be busy. Follow your passion, something you’re good at. A job that doesn’t even feel like a job when you’re doing it because that’s how much you LOVE it. If you feel you can’t do it because you feel not up to the task or not good enough, I know exactly how you feel. You just need to take the risk, and maybe it’ll lead to your happiness. For example, once I found that one thing I loved, I took the opportunity. What was that? Tennis! I played tennis for most of my life so once I was given the opportunity to play on my community college’s tennis team, I agreed. That was the beginning of everything for me. One opportunity after the next, I took it and tried to perfect it. My rambling is to convey that overall, you need to do something that defines you. It shouldn’t make you lose yourself even more, that’s just a negative way to live a life. Be busy with things that are worth your time and character development, not what others think you should be doing.

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Although, working all the time can cause stress in one’s life. Luckily, looking at your surroundings, eating good food, working out, and remaining involved in your community does wonders too. Live your best life, for all we know, we only got one!

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You Gotta Start Somewhere.

Hello my dear fashion fans and blog enthusiasts. This is my first personal blog post so please bare with me. For those of you who do know of me, you’re probably thinking little of me because I am following this blogging trend. To answer your thoughts, yes I am. However, I do not intend to do this for popularity or fame. It would be nice if I got connections through this experience, I will not lie. My intention for this blog is to express myself for my own pure enjoyment. I can only hope others will enjoy it along with me because I am very passionate about fashion and freedom of expression. As somebody who has written in a journal since the end of elementary school, run-on sentences and emotional statements are my written specialty. Just to clarify, I plan on mainly interviewing fashionable individuals and conducting research on the transition of past styles. This page of my blog is just for shits and giggles.