The Home Invasion?

Preface

I know this piece may seem darker than past material I have written. I am usually an optimistic individual who tries to see the best in situations. However, there is bad in the world that needs to have light shown on it because it should be fought against and stopped entirely. A little over a year ago, I attended a lecture that discussed the meaning of consent. I went with my friend, Krista Apardian who you may know from one of my blog interviews. All I  knew about this lecture was Planned Parenthood hosted it. I wanted to support the organization and I thought this would be useful. Unsurprisingly, it was! I found myself not being the best at asking for consent when I am interested in someone. For example, when it came to hand holding, touching, and kissing I was not very vocal about asking if I could proceed. Thanks to that lecture, I find myself way better at checking with my partner. Anyways, there was an analogy that stuck with me during the lesson. The woman who was leading the discussion explained how law enforcement tend to victim-blame sexual assault survivors. This shows when police ask women or men questions about the assault case. She related to how a sexual assault case should be handled similarly to a house break-in/robbery. It was as if a light bulb went off in the whole room. That analogy made so much sense, something was physically and morally taken away from you. The security and confidence of your property was stripped from you. You obviously WERE NOT ASKING to be robbed, or in this case assaulted. That idea made so much sense to me. Until, she asked a volunteer to come up so she can show the difference between interrogation for house robbery and sexual assault. Let’s just say the example didn’t quiet live up to the potential. Don’t get me wrong, it was still a great lecture and I would encourage everyone to attend it. I couldn’t help thinking, ‘Shit, they could’ve done so much more with this.’ Therefore, I wrote what I wish they said during their example of what a house robbery interrogation would sound like if it was handled like a sexual assault report. Trust me I could’ve kept going, but if any of you have any other add-ons or think I missed anything important, please feel free to comment below!

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Home Invasion?

“Miss, were you under the influence the night he robbed you of all your riches and peace of mind?”
“Miss, is your house decorated in any provocative exterior that could attract a robber to steal from the inside that is rightfully yours?”
“Miss, are you sure there wasn’t any prior interactions with the thief that could’ve led him to think you wanted your treasures to be wrongfully taken by him?”
“Miss, you said you sometimes keep your backdoor unlocked, are you sure that didn’t insinuate you wanted the home intruder to break in?”
“Miss, was the face of your house and roof made-up to encourage him to violently force his way inside?”
“Miss, were the blossoms of your flower beds showing? Trust me, this is important to know for this form of crime.”
“Miss, when you saw him and interacted with him, at any point, did you give him consent to enter your home?”
“You said you had a few glasses of wine before he broke into your home, are you sure your memory isn’t skewed from the alcoholic consumption? You know you didn’t confuse anything with your interaction from being a little intoxicated?”
“Do you think maybe the way your house is painted is a little showy, and maybe that’s why it happened?”
“”Miss, did you actually use words similar to ‘No, I do not want you to rob me.’?”
“Well, if you didn’t use those words, how did you tell the intruder you did not consent for him to come inside? Did you physically show you didn’t want him to rob you? What did you do physically to show you didn’t want him inside your house?”
“Miss, are you sure you made it obvious to him you didn’t want him inside your house?”
“Alright miss, well you’re free to go back to your home and we will hopefully get back to you soon about your police report.”
“Don’t forget to lock all your doors and be more thoughtful on how your home looks to others, especially at night when you’re alone.”

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